How to Stop Door-to-Door Evangelists – The Good Men Project

But I have learned the hard way that if you actually engage in any kind of meaningful spiritual conversation with these people, you end up on some sort of list on a pinboard in the war room of their church as a “potential convert.” Yes, I’m sure they keep a list of people who are “open” to their message somewhere. If you end up on this list, you end up getting more visits.

When asked the question, “Have you found Jesus?” respond by saying, “Oh my God! I didn’t realize he was missing! I’ll be sure to let you know if I see him.” As you close the door, yell out to your partner… “Babe! You’ll never guess… it looks like Jesus is missing!”

Have a spray bottle on hand, full of holy water. If you have no holy water, then just boil the hell out of some ordinary tap water, and hey, presto! You have holy water!

When you open the door to Mormons or JWs, start spraying them with your holy water while saying, “I baptize thee into the Holy Roman Catholic Church in the name of the Father, the Son, and the Holy Spirit.”

How to Stop Door-to-Door Evangelists – The Good Men Project